Dave Itzkoff and Jon Caramanica live-blogged the ceremony, which saw major awards go to the French dance music duo Daft Punk and the upstarts Macklemore & Ryan Lewis and Lorde.
11:45 P.M. Final Thoughts
Dave Itzkoff: Any closing wisdom, Jon? Once you got past those early Macklemore wins, was there anything that restored your faith in the system? Like this UCasino.com advertisement set to "Can't Hold Us"? It seems like a million years ago, but the Beyoncé/Jay Z performance that opened the show was a highlight for me, as was Lorde's live rendition of "Royals," and an all-too-short duet between Carole King and Sara Bareilles. I assume you agree with me 100 percent.
Jon Caramanica: Strangely enough, I do!
Dave Itzkoff: WHAT?
Jon Caramanica: The show was extremely front-loaded, I thought, but I would think that, being the type of person who thinks seeing Paul McCartney behind a psychedelic piano is something you do in a museum.
Dave Itzkoff: Well, thank you for taking the plunge with me and getting married to Macklemore's performance. I don't think we'll ever forget it.
Jon Caramanica: Two themes stand out — Daft Punk, of course, a reminder that you, too, can win oodles of Grammys if you'd just spend a couple million bucks making sure your album sounds like a 1977 cutout record. And two, the youth wave, such as it is, with Lorde and Macklemore & Ryan Lewis, two white artists who piggybacked onto mainstream hip-hop, threw stones at it from above, and rode off to fame.
Dave Itzkoff: Where does Paul Williams fit into your careful thesis?
Jon Caramanica: In fairness, I would have taken Paul Williams behind a psychedelic piano.
Dave Itzkoff: Throw in Kermit the Frog and I'm right there with you.
11:41 P.M. Lindsey Buckingham Joins Queens of the Stone Age
Dave Itzkoff: You had me at Queens of the Stone Age, lost me at Lindsey Buckingham. This show is over, yes?
Jon Caramanica: But Rock is alive!
Dave Itzkoff: This is like three mash-ups too far. Mashes-up?
Jon Caramanica: At least Skrillex isn't in this.
Dave Itzkoff: True! Where was the EDM representation in all this?
Jon Caramanica: I can only hope Avicii is somewhere D.J.-ing for $350,000 tonight.
Dave Itzkoff: I was literally trying to fav your comment.
11:33 P.M. Daft Punk Wins Album of the Year
Dave Itzkoff: HOW CAN THEY HAVE THIS MANY PEOPLE STILL TO COME? They're already two minutes over, by my count. Oh thank you, Lorde. I think we're in the home stretch.
Jon Caramanica: What a bizarre set of nominees for Album of the Year.
Dave Itzkoff: Unexpected winner as well? It wasn't Taylor Swift, and it wasn't Macklemore.
Jon Caramanica: I'd have to say, given how well Macklemore did, and the playing field they gave him, this is a surprise, but Daft Punk speaks directly to out-of-touch voters. Hell, a couple dozen of them played on this album!
Dave Itzkoff: "This is the most insane thing ever" — Nile Rodgers.
"Back when I was drinking, I used to imagine things that weren't there … then I got sober and two robots called me to make an album" Paul Williams.
Jon Caramanica: Paul Williams very turnt up tonight.
11:27 P.M. Billie Joe Armstrong and Miranda Lambert Perform
Dave Itzkoff: Good for Billie Joe Armstrong and Miranda Lambert, but where is Norah Jones?
Jon Caramanica: You can't book Blake Shelton without booking Miranda — it's a fact. Look it up.
Dave Itzkoff: I thought that was a nicely handled in memoriam.
Jon Caramanica: All told, yes, except that it seems that they misspelled Cory Monteith's name?
Dave Itzkoff: No. Uh oh. Oh they did. "Montieth."
11:22 P.M. Recognizing Music Teachers
Dave Itzkoff: NEIL PORTNOW! NOW IT'S ON.
Jon Caramanica: John Legend got to weep on camera for a long time before because he agreed to shill for Portnow.
Dave Itzkoff: In fairness they were introducing a new Grammy award for music instructors, which this went to Kent Knappenberger, a teacher in rural New York. And his beard puts Portnow's to shame.
Jon Caramanica: This is a great thing to have at 11:20 p.m.
11:06 P.M. Macklemore Requests the Honor of Your Presence …
Dave Itzkoff: Here we go. Greatest meme in the history of the Internet, coming up. And Madonna slipping in a chorus of "Open Your Heart."
Jon Caramanica: WHAT, WHAT, WHAT IS HAPPENING? This is easily peak insanity at the Grammys.
Jon Caramanica: To recap: Madonna is dressed as an evil sheriff from "Justified" and is singing an art-song version of "Open Your Heart" after 33 couples got married to a Macklemore & Ryan Lewis Song under the watchful eye of Queen Latifah. Did I miss anything?
Dave Itzkoff: I think they got the stained glass on discount from Nicki Minaj's stage show.
Jon Caramanica: Stained plexiglass. Every part of that was face-melting. Better than 100 Lang Lang / Metallica mash-ups.
11:01 P.M. Impending Nuptials?
Dave Itzkoff: I believe we were promised a mass wedding. Where is it?
Jon Caramanica: Did you say Red Wedding?
Dave Itzkoff: Oh my god seriously. Ah — here it comes!
11:00 P.M. Daft Punk Wins Record of the Year
Dave Itzkoff: Daft Punk wins for "Get Lucky." That category was impossible to call. Daft Punk definitely a favorite, but so were Robin Thicke and Lorde, I thought.
Jon Caramanica: Yes this was a toss-up, but Daft Punk is going to beat out Robin Thicke every time when it comes to nostalgia-minded voters.
Dave Itzkoff: Jon, on a scale of 0 to 1, how psyched are you for Metallica and Lang Lang?
Jon Caramanica: Totally 1. I believe in schadenfreude. Think of all the art Lars Ulrich is gonna sell to Lang Lang.
Dave Itzkoff: No idea what this is doing in the show. I see Kirk [Hammett] is wearing a "Transformer" T-shirt, I guess that makes this a Lou Reed tribute somehow?
Jon Caramanica: Is that a Laurie Anderson shot?
10:40 P.M. 'Royals' Is Song of the Year
Dave Itzkoff: Little Ella Yelich-O'Connor! She did it.
Jon Caramanica: Beating out Macklemore, no less. One slight skeptic of mainstream hip-hop excess bests the other — a close race!
Dave Itzkoff: I just want to hear Lorde say "mental" a few more times.
Jon Caramanica: Lorde also respectfully let the guy no one cares about speak first. She is the ethics queen!
10:38 P.M. Carole King and Sara Bareilles Perform
Dave Itzkoff: This Carole King / Sara Bareilles duo might make me cry, no joke.
Jon Caramanica: Literally just made a Sara Bareilles/Carole King joke a couple of weeks ago. Who knew? Carole King really giving this song more gravitas than she could have with Katy Perry's "Roar."
Dave Itzkoff: Katy must be SUPER jealous. "What a thrill to see the future of music in such good hands," Carole King says to not-Katy Perry.
10:26 P.M. Stevie Wonder Joins Daft Punk and Pharrell
Dave Itzkoff: I'm kinda excited for this, Jon. You can't bring me down! Did Pharrell change hats?
Jon Caramanica: Sure, sure, sure, I will let you have the cold comfort of your nostalgic urges, Dave. Also: this is exactly what recording in a studio is like.
Dave Itzkoff: We've come too far to give up who we are, Jon.
Jon Caramanica: This is literally what the 1977 Grammys looked and sounded like.
Dave Itzkoff: There's an Up With People vibe going around.
Jon Caramanica: Very bar mitzvah in there.
Dave Itzkoff: If it's a bar mitzvah, where's Drake?
Jon Caramanica: L'chaim!
10:22 P.M. Kacey Musgraves Wins Best Country Album
Dave Itzkoff: Kacey Musgraves defeats T Swift! And somehow the award didn't go to Macklemore!
Jon Caramanica: This is, undeniably, a coup. And proof that Grammy voters love to vote authenticity over pop when given a chance.
10:17 P.M. All-Star Country Jam
Dave Itzkoff: How many Firestone tires died for Jeremy Renner's outfit?
Jon Caramanica: To be fair, he was just trying to match Lorde's fingertips.
Dave Itzkoff: Please tell me they're going to do the "Highwaymen" verse about the star captain in outer space. Love that verse.
Dave Itzkoff: They didn't do it!
Jon Caramanica: Blake Shelton was drinking through rehearsal.
Dave Itzkoff: I feel like Alexander Payne is already adapting this musical number as his next movie.
Jon Caramanica: I feel like they trolled Imagine Dragons and told them there were no available showers. When do you think they're gonna have a chance to rehearse this?
10:07 P.M. Bruno Mars Wins Best Pop Album
Dave Itzkoff: Bruno! Watch for him at MetLife Stadium next week wearing about 100 more layers.
Jon Caramanica: Hey! Bruno Mars is popular! We swear! We liked him before the Super Bowl did!
9:59 P.M. Paul and Ringo Take the Stage
Dave Itzkoff: LL has to tell us what's coming up in the next HOUR. "We've only just begun." JUST BEGUN. Dang, I thought he was going to introduce Meryl. Ah, now the Paul and Ringo duet. Thank you, Based God.
Jon Caramanica: Where was Julia Roberts when the Beatles landed in New York?
Dave Itzkoff: Not even a twinkle in her daddy's eye. Eric Roberts was 7, though.
Jon Caramanica: If this band was a new band it would be playing venues in Bushwick even I don't go to.
9:53 P.M. Kacey Musgraves Performs
Dave Itzkoff: Feel like I'm definitely going to wake up tomorrow to an email from my mom disapproving of Kacey Musgraves's outfit.
Jon Caramanica: Tell your mom to chill! This is a win for her.
Dave Itzkoff: She's singing about joints, Jon. And kissing girls! On CBS!
Jon Caramanica: Is this an episode of "Two and a Half Men"? ZING! #tvcriticism
Dave Itzkoff: Does this mean we are only half way through the Grammys program??????
9:50 P.M. Slide Show: On the Red Carpet
9:44 P.M. Kendrick Lamar and Imagine Dragons Perform
Dave Itzkoff: LL Cool J reminds us it's the 30th anniversary of Def Jam Records, a label that surely would have signed Macklemore & Ryan Lewis.
Jon Caramanica: A label that would have trashed Imagine Dragons's dressing room.
Dave Itzkoff: "Def Jam forever!" — guy who is no longer on Def Jam. "This is it, the apocalypse." — Imagine Dragons.
Jon Caramanica: Taylor Swift is the No. 1 one rap fan. Is this whole performance a subtweet to Macklemore & Ryan Lewis?
Dave Itzkoff: Is that a note of approval from you, Jon?
Jon Caramanica: It is not! It is merely an observation. This is very irritating. Kendrick deserves better. The question is: does he know he deserves better?
Dave Itzkoff: Queen Latifah's uncertainty speaks for us all.
Jon Caramanica: That was… memorable. A wise man once told me that divisive is better than ignored, so…
9:39 P.M. Jay Z and Timberlake Win Best Rap Collaboration
Dave Itzkoff: Where is Timberlake?
Jon Caramanica: Justin couldn't get out of the Target commercial in time.
Dave Itzkoff: "I want to thank God, I mean, a little bit," says Jay. But then he thanks Beyoncé, and tells daughter Blue he has a gold sippy cup for her.
Jon Caramanica: Didn't Drake already drink out of his Grammy?
Dave Itzkoff: Who do I give my money to for "Maleficent"?
9:31 P.M. Ringo Starr Takes the Stage
Dave Itzkoff: SABBATH. But who will translate Ozzy for us?
Jon Caramanica: At least Dave Grohl isn't drumming for Ringo. Related: is Ringo is what Nate Ruess will look like in 30 years?
Dave Itzkoff: Ringo Starr appears courtesy of "The Night That Changed America, Feb. 9 on CBS." I feel obligated to say that for some reason.
Jon Caramanica: Even Beatles fans are taking bathroom breaks right now. This is stultifyingly dull.
Dave Itzkoff: I thought he was going to duet with McCartney, no? Can Dave Grohl get up there and broker some peace?
9:24 P.M. Lorde Wins Best Solo Pop Performance
Dave Itzkoff: Step off Sara Bareilles and Katy Perry! Lorde takes solo pop performance.
Jon Caramanica: Best GIF will be of her dead-serious eyes followed by the one of her deep exhale on stage. Or maybe she was merely responding to Sara Bareilles's hair.
Dave Itzkoff: And still not old enough to rent cars in this country! The talent is frightening.
9:21 P.M. Pink and Nate Ruess Perform
Dave Itzkoff: Shh, I gotta listen in on Bruno. Oh, he's just introing Pink and Nate Ruess. Give me something I can use for my article, Bruno! I guess I've seen enough of Pink's acrobatic shtick, but I'm warming to her duet with John Waters.
Jon Caramanica: I spent all my opinions on Fun. in 2012.
9:05 P.M. Taylor Swift Performs
Dave Itzkoff: TSWIFTTTTTTTTTTTTTT! A very vigorous performance. Could use a Jennifer Lawrence photobomb, though.
Jon Caramanica: Could use a headbanging GIF. So impressive how Taylor has gone from the teenage door-busting threat to country music to a 45-year-old adult contemporary balladeer in just five or so years.
9:03 P.M. Paul McCartney and Friends Win Best Rock Song
Dave Itzkoff: Incredibly, the Grammys could not give an award to both the Rolling Stones AND Paul McCartney. So McCartney (and Dave Grohl) get it.
Jon Caramanica: Really glad Dave Grohl was around to help this underdog win a Grammy.
Dave Itzkoff: Yeah, Krist Novoselic, interrupting Dave Grohl's Beatles shout-out to give his own shout-out to Black Sabbath.
9:00 P.M. John Legend Takes the Stage
Dave Itzkoff: John Legend introing "All of Me" — is he going to be joined by (a) special guest(s)? Or you mean a musician gets to just play their own song, by themselves, at the Grammys?
8:50 P.M. Keith Urban and Gary Clark Jr. Perform
Dave Itzkoff: Nothing to say about this Keith Urban performance, though I'm surprised Fox is willing to loan him out for the night.
Jon Caramanica: Look, I'll play nice. Keith Urban and Gary Clark Jr. are both phenomenal guitar players. Can't you tell?
Dave Itzkoff: It's comfortable.
Jon Caramanica: Even these dueling solos are polite. Gary Clark should be trying to demolish Keith Urban but he's too nice for that. Also this is a bad song, F.Y.I.
Dave Itzkoff: But Pauley Perrette will save us by explaining social media to us, right?
Jon Caramanica: All my selfies have Pauley Perrette in them.
8:44 P.M. Robin Thicke Joins Chicago
Dave Itzkoff: Is LL hinting at Chicago and Robin Thicke? I deduced his clues correctly!
Jon Caramanica: Whoever paired Robin Thicke and Chicago has a genuine sense of humor! Miley coming out to sing "You're the Inspiration" soon?
Dave Itzkoff: This is like the most simpatico pairing since hydrogen met oxygen. Can't believe Peter Cetera has to take a back seat, though. Fortunately for CBS, everyone kept their tops on for "Blurred Lines."
8:33 P.M. Here Comes Katy Perry
Dave Itzkoff: "The Grammys had a choice between reuniting two of the Beatles or all of the Jonas Brothers. That's a tough one." — Steve Coogan. Just a set-up for Katy Perry, who I believe is going to do "Brave." I mean, "Roar." Well obviously this isn't "Roar."
Some sort of outtake from "Masters of the Universe"?
Jon Caramanica: "Dark Horse"! Juicy J has won an Oscar and it's still a shock to see him on the Grammys stage. Kudos to Katy for being the second best goth performance of the night, though.
8:30 P.M. A Grammy for 'Get Lucky'
Dave Itzkoff: Quite the show down between "Get Lucky," "Blurred Lines" and "Suit & Tie." But "Get Lucky" takes it. The Daft Punk 'bots decline to comment. Pharrell begins, "Dude."
Jon Caramanica: Hard to have someone to root for in this one, or against for that matter. Bless Nile Rodgers, though. And whoever ventilates Daft Punk's helmets.
8:22 P.M. Praise for Lorde
Dave Itzkoff: I'm done. I'm out. So happy.
Jon Caramanica: Some things Lorde did beautifully: pleated pants, platform boots, paint-dipped fingers, purple lipstick. And sing.
Dave Itzkoff: Those NAILS.
Jon Caramanica: It seems safe to say that the Grammys are downhill from here? Everything after this is a duet between the ghost of Ray Price and a Victrola playing a Bread album.
Dave Itzkoff: I am still marginally looking forward to Daft Punk, and to Paul and Ringo. That still leaves about three hours of show, though.
8:12 P.M. Macklemore & Ryan Lewis Are Best New Artists
Dave Itzkoff: First award of the night will be best new artist — I guess Pharrell has to get out quick to fight some forest fires or something.
Jon Caramanica: He has the Grammy under his hat! Tricky!
Dave Itzkoff: Another win for Macklemore & Ryan Lewis. Get happy, Jon. Start typing that think piece.
Jon Caramanica: #been #typed. Kacey Musgraves gets to be bummed on camera again.
Dave Itzkoff: Shh, I don't want to miss a single frame of this Lorde performance. See you in like three minutes.
Hey @Pharrell, can we have our hat back? #GRAMMYs
— Arby's (@Arbys) 27 Jan 14
8:04 P.M. Beyoncé and Jay-Z Open the Grammys
Dave Itzkoff: Now let's get ready for the comedy stylings of LL Cool J. No, my mistake — we're opening on a performance from Beyoncé.
Jon Caramanica: An actually smart choice by the Grammys, even if B isn't up for the big awards tonight. No one is more relevant than her at this moment.
Dave Itzkoff: By law, this Beyoncé performance has to be followed by a speech from Obama or an electrical failure. No way — they got Barney's designer and Anheuser Busch creative director Shawn Carter to perform with Beyoncé?
Jon Caramanica: He's phenomenally busy! promoting D'Usse cognac! And saying "breastices" on network TV. Can I encourage readers to report him to the FCC?
Dave Itzkoff: And NOW the comedy stylings of LL Cool J. Finally.
Dave Itzkoff: "Music warms us, which is a good thing for all of our friends back East. Brrrrr." I can't believe LL went there!
Jon Caramanica: "NCIS: LA" made him soft
7:41 P.M. A Coronation for Macklemore?
Dave Itzkoff: We're still a few minutes away from the start of the show —
Jon Caramanica: Or are we? I'm suffering already.
Dave Itzkoff: But, clearly, the big news is Macklemore & Ryan Lewis dominating the pre-show rap categories, including a win in the best rap album category over nominees like Kanye West, Drake and Kendrick Lamar.
Jon Caramanica: To the surprise of absolutely no one.
Dave Itzkoff: Jon, I'm feeling like you have a reaction.
Jon Caramanica: 1,200 words in the Tuesday paper. Next.
Dave Itzkoff: The big pre-pre-show news, before a single award was even distributed, was an on-air stunt that will occur during Macklemore & Ryan Lewis's performance of "Same Love," at which 34 couples are going to be married by Queen Latifah. (Didn't make any of that up.) So is this night basically a coronation of Macklemore & Ryan Lewis?
Jon Caramanica: Let's all support marriage equality, which is to say the right to be married in a fashion that will embarrass you and your children and your children's children for time eternal. You have to wonder if Macklemore was the safe vote in rap categories for people who know nothing about rap, but they'll make a hard turn to someone like Taylor Swift in the big categories.
Dave Itzkoff: I take it you are more excited for the duet between Imagine Dragons and Kendrick Lamar?
Jon Caramanica: I wish I didn't know what I know about the origins of that duet. On the plus side, Imagine Dragons up for best rap performance next year!
Dave Itzkoff: To be continued!
7:32 P.M. Grammy Weddings: Sweet Statement or Stunt?
This morning my colleague Ben Sisario reported that the Grammy Awards decided to add something new to its show this year: a marriage ceremony that will coincide with Macklemore and Ryan Lewis's performance of "Same Love." The song became a pro-gay marriage anthem in 2013, a year that saw advances for same-sex marriage across the United States after Supreme Court rulings and actions in various states. And tonight 34 couples, gay and straight, will join in that spirit by making their unions official in a ceremony officiated by Queen Latifah.
The news prompted some confusion and criticism on social media. Many saw the event as a stunt. Others thought it might only involve same-sex couples. Here are a few selected reactions from users of Twitter.
One journalist, Amanda Marcotte, questioned the Grammy producers' assertion that the ceremony shouldn't be seen as making a big statement about the political conflict around marriage:
http://t.co/ddAN1DLVU3 The funniest part is the repeat insistence that this not be taken as a statement.
— Amanda Marcotte (@AmandaMarcotte) 26 Jan 14
Another Twitter user saw some hypocrisy in the way the ceremony would involve so many couples:
like they snickered at Rev. Moon for performing RT @jmattbarber Grammy clowns to feature mass "gay wedding" circus http://t.co/qF2ChxOd44
— Bill P. (@billpr53) 26 Jan 14
One woman shared how she'd react if it happened to her:
If I had a fiancé and he suggested we get married during a Macklemore performance we wouldn't be getting married…ever #grammys
— Brittanie (@ItsBriittaniiee) 26 Jan 14
Boing Boing's Xeni Jardin wondered if the marriages would have much duration:
On tonight's Grammys, 34 gay and straight couples will get married to a Macklemore song. They all get divorced on the next Daytime Emmys.
— Xeni Jardin (@xeni) 26 Jan 14
Josh Greenman at the New York Daily News imagined how the marriages that lasted would be seen in the future:
"Daddy, do we have to watch your wedding video *again*???" http://t.co/t5eezyj9bX
— Josh Greenman (@joshgreenman) 26 Jan 14
And some Twitter users said they were ready to ignore the whole event:
I'm going to completely ignore the annoying Macklemore wedding thirsty Grammy ratings ploy.
— c-lo (@goodgirlcrystal) 26 Jan 14
But not everyone was so cynical about the Grammy nuptials. One woman expressed her excitement that friends of hers would be participating:
a friend of a friend of mine is getting married during tonight's performance of macklemore at the grammys. pretty cool.
— Hayley ツ (@HayleyzZZ) 26 Jan 14
And another user of the social media service was ready to break out the hanky:
If Macklemore actually has 34 couples getting married in his performance, I will be crying during the whole thing.
— mocha clifford. (@__lovesincerely) 26 Jan 14
She wasn't alone in welcoming the event:
Macklemore's performance will definitely be one for the history books! 34 couples will be getting married on stage!!! WOW!!! #CityGRAMMYs
— Jordan Miller (@greendayrock92) 26 Jan 14
34 couples are getting married during Macklemore's performance tonight. How cute.
— Kenz.♡ (@_kenziii) 26 Jan 14
If Macklemore is really having those couples get married during his performance then that'll be dope.
— India. (@RebelleMonroe_) 26 Jan 14
— Michael Roston
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